Not that simple...

Have you ever felt like in your life you just go round and round in circles?  Some of you may have gotten everything figured out and the path that you tread leads you to the end that you so anticipated.  Well for me, it has not been that simple.  I remember during my teenage years, I gave my life to God because I wanted Him to have all of me; to lead me and order my steps.  My finite young mind had this preconceived notion that everything would be peaches and cream, and any and everything that my heart's desire would come to pass just as I planned.  Oh, how I quickly, learned that I was sadly mistaken.  According to Isaiah 55:8-9, the bible says "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the Lord.  As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts". 
In my mind, even though I surrendered my life to Him, did I surrender everything to Him?  Fast forward to some years later, I still find myself in the continued struggle of surrendering everything to Him.  Many times when the struggle seems to be overbearing I want to take things into my hand and try to fix them the way I think it should, my purpose, my marriage, the ministry God had given, my family, and oh, Lord…..my children.  I often question whether or not what God has said will ever come to the past.  Now, believe me, I know that every word that God has spoken WILL come to pass; however, it is very hard for me to believe that God will do it for me and my family.  I have been faced with some challenges, my husband's health, the lack of enough finances, planting churches that have not been able to be sustained, my children and their education and even training them up to love God with everything within them.  There are so many times that I want to get into a corner and ball up into a fetal position and just sit and rock myself.
Regardless of all these challenges that I face, God always knows how to drop a Word to remind me of His love for me and to let me know that He cares about every facet of my life.  I realize that I am important to him and think about the scripture, Deuteronomy 31:6, "Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave your or forsake you".  This is the reassurance that when I am struggling to believe God, He is holding me in His arms.  God continues to comfort me and I am slowly gaining my strength, my faith, and the persistence to fight and know that, God will not put more on me than I can bear. 
I continue to walk in faith believing that God's plan will prevail.  So, whatever, challenges you are facing always remember that God's plan is perfect for our lives.  It doesn't matter if the challenges you are facing was self-made or not, Romans 8:28 says, And we know that God works all things together for the food of those who love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.  Give everything to God and he would be able to make sure that everything is okay.  When we interfere we stop the process of what God is trying to do within our lives.  During this 2020 year, please see how you can release those things that you hold dear to your heart to God and watch how he is going to turn everything around for His glory.
 
Guest Blogger,
Kierston A, Bartney